Mr. Mercado
THE
INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH AND THESIS STATEMENT
Sample
Question:
To what extent did the Civil War constitute a revolution in American society?
STRUCTURING AN
INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH:
1.
Establish the setting of the
essay.
Briefly introduce the reader to the subject.
·
(Example: “The Civil War, occurring between the years 1861 and 1865,
was the most devastating conflict in American history.”
2.
Provide an insightful comment that establishes your basis for analysis.
·
Example: “In determining whether the Civil War was a revolution in
American society, one must assess the extent to which society was changed by
the war.”
3.
Provide a partition that
establishes three major sub-topics you plan to discuss.
·
Example: "Politically, the war established the supremacy of the
Republican party in national politics for much of the next fifty years.
Socially, the war saw significant gains in African American rights. And
constitutionally, the war established the supremacy of the federal government
over the states."
4.
Finish paragraph with a clear
thesis statement that establishes the purpose of the essay.
·
Example: "Thus, the Civil War did, in fact, represent a political,
social and constitutional revolution in
THESIS TYPES:
1.
Simple thesis: “The Civil War was a
revolution in American society.”
(Rating: poor)
·
Thesis is far too simplistic. It contains no partition or analysis.
2.
Complex-simple thesis: “In some respects,
Americans experienced profound changes during the war. After the war, it was
clear that society had also been changed dramatically in a number of important
areas.” (Rating: fair)
·
The analytical aspect of the thesis is promising. However, no partition is established. The thesis
does not establish how American
society was changed by the war.
3.
Simple-split thesis: “The Civil War was a
revolution in
·
Thesis provides a partition:
politics, society, and the Constitution.
·
Thesis lacks an explanation or general analysis in each of the three
areas in the partition.
·
Note: This thesis would be a “simple thesis” if the question already
contained a partition.
4.
Complex-split thesis: "Politically, the war
established the supremacy of the Republican party in national politics for much
of the next fifty years. Socially, the war saw significant gains in African
American rights. And constitutionally, the war established the supremacy of the
federal government over the states. Thus, the Civil War did in fact represent a
political, social and constitutional revolution in
THE "GRAY
AREA" THESIS
Many AP questions allow the student to formulate a
thesis with more nuances. Here is a more sophisticated complex-split thesis to
the above question:
"Although the
Civil War resulted in the supremacy of the Republican party for the next fifty
years and led to a constitutional revolution regarding African American rights,
blacks in the South were virtually abandoned by the North in 1877 and
subsequently dominated by the white-supremacist Democratic party of the “Solid
South. Thus, to a larger extent, the
Civil War did represent a revolution constitutionally and in national politics
but it was not a complete revolution regarding social and political issues in
the South."
Notice that the above thesis argues "to a
larger extent." When answering a question, the writer must take a
position. It is not enough to state "to some extent" or "to
another extent." A thesis should
take a position one way or another.
Phrases such as "to a larger extent," "to a lesser extent," "more
important," "less important," etc., reveal that the writer has
taken a definite position on a question.
Moreover, the word “although” is used
effectively to begin the thesis.
It is important not to try to write a thesis that is
all "black" or all "white."
The most effective essays attempt to navigate the "gray area"
in a more sophisticated fashion. The highest scores on AP exams tend to be in
the "gray area."
RELATING THE
BODY OF THE ESSAY TO THE THESIS
Many AP essays will fall under the traditional
5-paragraph format (introduction, three body paragraphs, and conclusion). The
most effective essays consistently analyze the significance of events relating
to the thesis. Observe the outline
below:
Body Paragraph #1:
·
Topic Sentence
·
Term or event #1:
·
Definition
·
Significance/ relate to thesis
·
Term or event #2:
·
Definition
·
Significance/relate to thesis
·
Term or event #3:
·
Definition
·
Significance/relate to theses
·
Linking sentence
The following paragraph is written with the above
outline in mind.
The
Civil War resulted in a constitutional revolution in several ways (topic sentence #1). First, the 13th
Amendment, which abolished slavery (definition),
ended an institution in
Thus,
African Americans in the South did not experience a revolution in the years
following the end of Reconstruction in 1876 (topic sentence #2). Etc.